If you’re anything like me, then you know that carving out time for yourself can feel like a guilty pleasure. As soon as you step away from your work, you’re wondering, “Wait, shouldn’t I be doing something?” It’s called self-care guilt.
But quick reminder y’all: taking care of yourself is one of the most productive things you can do, and it’s a prerequisite for sustainable productivity. This is especially true if you’re someone with more than one passion. You can’t continue to make big moves if you have no way of pouring into yourself.
In this post, I’m listing four prompts to help you shift into more ease around self-care so that the next time you’re focusing on yourself, you can leave the guilt behind.
Prompt 1: What are you truly made for?
In your ideal world, wutchu doin’? What does your day-to-day look like? Do you wake up early or late? Do you leave your house or do you stay at home? What great things are you producing?
The first step to re-prioritizing your self-care is to be clear about what you’re truly made for. No limits. No external pressures. I want you to get specific about the details, down to how you feel each day and how much time you’re spending on each of your passions.
You don’t have to tell anyone else about this, but you’ve got to be honest with yourself about how you want to live your life. You can tell others, for accountability, or you can keep it to yourself, as long as you’re clear.
So write it down: get clear and get honest about what you want your life to look like.
Prompt 2: What does this require of you?
So let’s say you’re dreaming of becoming a social worker and having an online business, like my favourite blogger Dee. What kinds of things would you need to do and have in order to support your dreams?
If you asked Dee, she’d say you need to do:
- Have a passion for helping others and act on that passion whether it’s through volunteer work or paid employment
- Use that experience to get into your social work program of choice
She’d also say you need to prioritize self-care and have a strong support system. “You can’t pour from an empty cup, and both social work and running a business take a lot out of you.”
(By the way, I did ask Dee and those are the things she legit listed.)
So once you’ve visualized what you want for yourself in the future, you need to identify what this truly means. What does a social worker need to do to get into that position? And more importantly, once there, what kinds of things make a social worker productive in the long run?
This is about analyzing the resources and behaviours you’ll need in order to be your most fulfilled self. If you can list these things, then you’re moving into a more concrete realization of what it’s going to take to do your thing.
So write it down: what is your dream self doing, and what’s helping her get it done?
Prompt 3: Why can’t you have those things now?
Here’s the block we have to get over: you deserve the things you just listed… right now. Not when you achieve your goals, but now, while you’re working towards them. If you’re working towards something that matters, set yourself up for success. (Read: 4 Reasons to Make Time for Your Passion Now)
The mentality that we’ll take care of ourselves when we “have time” or when we reach a certain milestone is dangerous because, quite frankly, if you’re working towards something big, it’s gon’ take a while. And if you’ve decided you’ll sleep when you get there, you might never get there. And if you do, you’ll probably be too tired to celebrate!
If you decided that your future self needs to be up and at work by 8:00 am, and that she needs to have 7 hours of sleep a night, then you need to do that now. Get 7 hours of sleep, and start work by 8:00 am.
If she deserves that life, then why don’t you? You’re actually one in the same.
Write it down: what kinds of things can you do for yourself now so that you’ll have the energy and skills to accomplish your goals?
Prompt 4: What advice would someone who’s done it give to you?
Just in case you’re not convinced that you need to prioritize your self-care right now, consider what someone who’s already made it big in your field would tell you. I can guarantee you that whoever you’re looking up to will tell you that their path was filled with hard work and that the work is ongoing. They’re going to tell you that you need to be able to sustain yourself. So if you’re in it for the long run, make sure you have a plan to take care of yourself.
Who do you admire? If you can reach them through email, phone, or in person, ask them how important their self-care is. If you can’t reach them personally, have they written a book you could read? How do they maintain their self-care? (Spoiler alert: this is probably an ongoing process that they’re working through too).
Write it down: what pearls about professional/personal self-care have you heard from people that you admire? This could be advice that was given directly to you, or something useful that they’ve written or said in an interview.
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Summary
So that’s it y’all. Short and sweet because the decision to take care of yourself should be short and sweet! I hope you’ve come to the end of this post being reminded that there’s no shame in supporting yourself now so that you can continue to make strides towards your passions. We walked through:
- Identifying your ideal self
- The resources you’ll need to support the things she does
- Recognizing that you deserve these things too, and
- Leaning into others who’ve done what you’re doing
If you’d like to make more time for your passions, get your hands on my Focus Planner that walks you through reflecting on what matters most to you. You can fill it out electronically or by hand so that you know what to work on and what to pause on for now. And with the extra time, you can relax into some warm, fuzzy, and needed self-care.
