Have you ever found yourself counting down to the weekend, exhausted? Trick question because who hasn’t, right? But how did you get there? I’ve come to the end of so many weeks wondering, why am I so tired? Is there something wrong with me?
Most times, the answer is no; it’s just that my self-care is lacking.
If you’re going to make strides towards each of your passions, you have to be in a space where you have something to give. In other words, your self-care practice is going to make it possible for you to achieve each of your goals.
In this post, I’ve identified four early clues that I need to refocus on myself. They’re pretty basic things, but as we walk through them, I hope they’ll help you identify some of your own. The earlier you can clue into the fact that you need some time for yourself, the longer you’ll be able to remain productive. This post also contains a free Focus Planner to help you re-prioritize your goals, so make sure to download that as well.
Clue #1: I feel like a fraud
We all suffer from imposter syndrome from time to time. (Read: What Type of Imposter Are You? I was all 5). There are moments when we doubt ourselves and wonder, Can I really do what I’ve said I’m qualified to do? Is someone going to call me out on it?
This happens to me all the time, but only when I’m not doing anything. I usually only worry about not being “enough” when I’m not doing enough: enough exploring, enough writing, enough practice, enough self-care. When I’m doing those things, I’m too busy producing meaningful results to worry about whether or not I fit in.
If I’m feeling like a fraud, I need to focus on my self-care, because a huge part of it includes recognizing and challenging negative self-talk. So, one of my earliest signs that I’m slacking on my self-care is that I have less professional confidence.
When it comes to the work that you do, what is your first clue that you need to put the focus back on you? This could be that you’re:
- Failing to meet deadlines
- Nervous about showing up for work
- Comparing yourself to other people in your field
- Constantly late or
- Constantly leaving late
Write down your first clue so that you can step back into self-care whenever you’re doubting your competence.
Clue #2: my curls aren’t moisturized
You read that right. I love my natural hair, but I do not wake up like this. If I’m rocking a beautiful twist out or updo, it’s because I spent some time on my hair.
As soon as my coils start to feel dry, I know I need to up my self-care. It means that I’ve had rushed nights and mornings, and I need to re-evaluate what I’m spending my time on. Something’s not right if I don’t have time to glance at a mirror before I leave the house.
It sounds so silly to say, but the state of my hair is a direct reflection of the state of my self-care. What aspect of your physical self-care is the first to go out the window when you’re busy? Is it your:
- Workouts?
- Rest?
- Make-up routine?
- Meal prepping?
Write this down so you can notice it right away and prioritize your self-care practices.
Clue #3: It’s been a while since I’ve read a good book
One of my favourite things to do is to curl up with a book and a cup of tea. There’s nothing like a good book to get you thinking and inspire you. There’s also nothing like a good book to steal your time because, before you know it, it’s well into the night, you’re on page 153, and you have to find out how it ends.
If I can’t remember the last time I got lost in a book, then I know that somewhere along the line, I stopped prioritizing myself. Reading is something I do on my own, and as an introvert, I need that time to myself to emotionally recharge.
Fill in the blank. When I’m craving _______, I know my self-care is lacking. Ex. When I’m craving:
- Dancing
- Painting
- Writing
- Alone time
- Time with friends
- Time with family
Clue #4: I can’t remember what my goals are
Y’all. I know this sounds awful, but sometimes I can’t remember what I’m working towards. Why, again, am I working so hard?
This is a problem. As soon as I find myself wondering what my goals are, I know that I could be doing better for myself. If I can’t tell you off the top of my head what matters and what I’m envisioning for myself, then my personal self-care is definitely lacking.
What is your first clue that you could use more personal self-care? Some clues might be that:
- You haven’t gotten closer to any of your dreams
- You’re feeling embarrassed or silly about your passion (Read: 4 Reasons to Make Time For Your Passion Now)
- You can’t articulate what matters most to you
- You’re feeling overwhelmed by the amount of things you have to do
If this feels like you, download your Focus Planner to help clarify what matters to you.
Summary
It is so hard to prioritize your self-care when you’re working towards more than one thing. Your goals and dreams require hard work, and taking time to just relax can seem like a waste of time.
This kind of thinking is 100% a trap because, if you’re close to running on empty, you’re going to be forced to pause. If you can pick up on the small things that tell you you need a break before they snowball into catastrophe, then you’ll end up being more productive for longer.
As you read through this post, you’ve done the important work of identifying your earliest:
- Professional
- Physical
- Emotional and
- Personal clues
That you need to shift inward and focus on you.
These signs are crucial in letting you know that you need a bit more self-care so you can avoid burnout and stay productive in your passions.
It’s also important to stay clear on what passions are priorities right now, so if you’re part of our email community (sign up below), you’ll get the focus planner sent to you. Let me know what some of your earliest clues are in the comments below, and I’ll see you in my next post!
